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You little lying bastard

I hate every guy in the fucking planet. Jerk. Stupid piece of fucking testosterone. Waste of air. Jesus, and everyone wonders why I don't trust people! Goood fucking God. Sorry, I'm not perfect. Sorry I'm not a slut. Sorry I don't wear makeup and act like a barbie doll. BASTARD SUCK A FAT COCK AND EAT AN EMBRYO.
I am really into this new guy I have been chatting with lately. He lives nearby. I mean we don't go to the same school. (thankfully). Anyways, we don't get to talk like A LOT. But, last night we did. I somehow got into the subject of when my mother died, and that my dad was selfish and moved us out here. He opened my eyes to the fact that "Well, you probably haven't been told this before, but, your dad was just really trying to help. He most likely couldn't stand the fact of waking up by himself and having no one next to him. And he moved so quickly maybe because everything reminded you guys and himself, of your mom." I told him how it made me feel...It just meant a lot for some reason. But he certainly points out things well. I can't really complain about the way things are lately. I had to go to cour the other day to determine if I should have my license taken away or not. The judge decided that I can keep my license, but I have to pay a fine of 124 bucks. Not too bad. It could have been five hundred....I went to the doctor again on Wednesday. They are having to do some blood tests, and samples. They made me drink this nasty ass glucose filled drink that was really disgusting because they had to see the way my body reacts to the glucose....So, after I drank the drink, I had to wait an hour so they could draw blood. Then after they drew that blood, they had to wait another hour and did the same thing. So 4 samples all together. Not to mention last weeks little blood fiasco, where they couldn't even find my veins. Like, I don't know how many different times I was pricked with needles. And if they guaranteed that there was a vein there, there wasn't and they weaved the needle around, and there still wasn't. So I get results back soon. :p


This feeling.
So blank.
I'm meaningless.
I'm a wreck.
No one knows how bad I feel about it.
I'm so sorry.
I'm facing the computer quietly sobbing to myself.
My fucking ringtone is somebody kill me please from the wedding singer.
I'm about to go to my room and put on "Fuck it, I don't want you back" by Eamon.
And eat a bunch of cliche foods that go along with breakups.

Eventually, I'll be alright.

Writer's Block: God For a Day

If you could be God for a day, what three things would be at the top of your to-do list?
There is no God. I do believe this is going to be a controversial subject on LJ!

Aug. 4th, 2008

I'm falling so hard for you. You're so amazing. There's one thing...keeping us apart.
What do you do when you have a boyfriend, who loves you. And you have another person that you have barely known for a month, but they are the package, im talking, cute, funny, and so, REAL. What am I supposed to do.I feel awful for all this. I do.

Writer's Block: Immigration

If you had to immigrate from your current home, where in the world would you choose to go?
London probably the boys are way cuter there. :p I hate the united states. 

Maybe Greece or Canada. Greece because everything is pretty.
Canada because...well Canada just seems better.
Dude, totally wing it.
Are you prepared for a zombie outbreak, or are you just going to wing it?
 Dude, totally wing it. Knowing my luck, I'd end up like Shaun of the Dead and go through all of that.
Try to describe yourself in one sentence.

1 word!  
All  the way from Indianapolis, Indiana to Columbus, Ohio. Why you ask? To visit this place:
Sat there and snapped a few pictures for about 10 minutes. And then left. 0.o 
What a great adventure. LOLL
 Why does life have to be so complicated? I swear. 

So, I'm meeting this guy sometime soon, at the mall, and I told Eric about it...and then my dumbass, had the nerve to tell him that "I give in to temptation". So then he's like "Oh Great, now I can't trust you." Then finally after calmly arguing about it for a while, he said "I trust you, I just don't trust other guys" 

Me: What if he, you know, makes a move on me?
Him:I'll fucking kill him.
Me:You won't do anything to me?
Me: 0.o

Meanwhile, I'm sitting here and I'm like, goood lord, What do I do? Eric doesn't know that I haven't told Kyle about him....My bad. Kyle doesn't know about Eric either...Whaaat he never asked.?!

Why is it that when I'm completely happy, I make big mistakes and fall for someone else, and mess everything up.

Lately, I've been burrowing my nose in books and comparing my lives to theirs.
I read Crank the other day. Excellent book. Definitely reccomended to you. ^_^
My life's not that terrible....yet. 

Peer pressure bites....Btw. xD